Things That Are Surprisingly Intense

An incomplete list.

Parents who insist their babies don’t have a schedule

Using three-pound hand weights during a workout

White people learning to meditate (a.k.a. me)

The warmth of the sun on a 72-degree day

Women who wear these clogs

Storms that don’t have names (often way more intense than storms with names — ironic.)

Self-identified “plant people”

Picking up the phone while someone is leaving you a voicemail.

Anything that comes before, “If not, no worries.”

The impact of seasonal allergies. (Gets me every year.)

The feeling I get in my chest when someone says, “Can everyone see my screen?”

Regular people who do polls on Instagram about where they should go on their next vacation. Nobody cares, Lisa.

My feelings about the Lime scooter that is always parked in front of my house.

I am contemplating making a sign, but it seems like it would be a bit aggressive. If you laughed, give me a <3. I’m quietly intense about my request for <3s too.